I'm Baaaacccckkk!

I apologize for the blog hiatus. There are several reasons why I have temporarily abandoned my blog.

1. I have been waiting, waiting, and waiting ever so patiently to buy myself a DSLR so I can give you better pictures than what I have been delivering in the past. I wasn't happy not one bit with the quality of them so I am holding out on some of my blog posts to bring you better pictures.

I have finally made the plunge! I bought myself a camera! YAY! Hip Hip Hooray! I didn't realize how stressful the decision was going to be to do so. I am quite the impulsive person and when I see something I want I usually just go after it, so to research the camera I wanted so diligently, bother other photographers to death with questions until they probably wanted to tell me to go fly a kite, keep up with competitive prices with different retail avenues, and researching the lenses I wanted is quite uncharacteristic of me.

I really am surprised with myself by this behavior. I tend to go out and buy something and learn the hard way on what I should have done. I was really stressed out about this because I wanted to make the best decision for myself and my beginner hobby photographer skills.

Which brand should I get? Which model should I get? What can I afford? If I get this camera, will I outgrow the usage of it in just a couple months and wish I went with the next model up? What lenses do I absolutely need first? What accesories are a must?

See! I was driving myself crazy! But I'm happy that I did because I am happy with my decision now... I think.  Should I have gotten the next model up? No! I am happy with my decision! I really am freaking myself out about this. This is coming from a girl that just breezes through life with almost no worries.

So anyways, I will share with you my camera adventure in a later post.

2. I wrote a blog post that included a quote from a Buddhist that comforted me in a time of pain. It seemed to speak to me and give me the words that I needed to hear. To me, it could have been written by a kindergartener and I would have still found comfort in those words. Just because the words came from a different religion doesn't mean I should turn my head away from them. I guess my boundaries of people, things, and thoughts are more blurred than others. I don't pay much attention to boundaries and segregation.

When I write my blog, I write it as though I am talking to a friend. I don't hold anything back, I'm honest, and I don't try to shrink myself down to what would be popular and get my blog more followers. I want this blog to just grow organically because in all honesty, for me, it's just an outlet.

I was surprised by some of the comments in passing that I got from people that read that post. I had people trying to pretty much "save" me from the Buddhist religion and show me the error in my ways, that I should choose Chrisitianity. I had people comment that they loved the quote and that is was so true, but they weren't going to reveal the source because it was Buddhist.

I know that I knew better to write about something as sensitive as religion, but I wrote was true to me at the time. I felt like I needed to defend myself and email people back explaining why I wrote that but I never could bring myself to press the send button. It almost hurt my feelings that people were reacting this way, but I get that my words were misunderstood. My relationship with God is just fine, by the way. Reading a book on Buddhism does not make me a pagan.

I thought long, hard and soaked everything in from that experience. Should I filter my blog to make it more reader friendly? Should I have not been so vulnerable and write what I did? Do I need to explain myself?

All I can say is that I will not change who am I and what I write. I do understand that people will not always agree with what I have to say but I am setting myself up for that when I type the words out and send it out to cyber space. I can take it. I'm a big girl. 

I don't feel the need to explain myself, apologize, or debate my reasoning. What I do feel is that the people that know me, understand me and my love and appreciation for everything in this world, know that I mean no malace or hurt in my expression of this love. I love culture. I love understanding things. I love digging to the roots of everything. I love knowledge. I wish I could be a full time student and just learn my days away.

This expereience somewhat scared me away from my blog for a little bit but I will let you know that I am here to stay. I will continue writing what I have to offer this blog and I won't stop until I'm ready to stop.

On that note, upcoming blogs will cover my first year of gardening, Blaze's new goldfish tank that I have taken on as another obsession of mine, great photos, and more exciting things.

3. I've just been too darn busy!

Love all of you that read the blog. Whether you like it, love it, or hate it... Thank you!

-Kaci