Ode to Zipper

Zipper is the reason I fell in love with my darling husband, Clint. Let me elaborate just a tad. Rather, let me elaborate quite a bit.

Zipper is a Jack Russell Terrier with a huge personality and a zest for life. He is very handsome and has a long tail that wags to his own patented rhythm. He will play catch probably right up until the moment that he falls over dead. He is very caring and wears his feelings on his sleeve ...if dogs wore sleeves. I guess some dogs do wear sleeves, but Zipper doesn't. He's too cool for that. Well, except in the winter when he has to wear his winter coat while chasing cows out of the barn. But on a regular day, no sleeves for Zipper.

He spent many hours napping on my bulging belly while I was pregnant with Blaze. I had so many dreams and warm thoughts of Blaze and Zipper growing up together and creating a bond like the kids in "Marley & Me" did. I fight back tears often when I think about Zipper. I wonder what he's doing, if someone is taking care of him and loving him as much as we did, if someone throws him a tennis ball. Or giving him the occasional Cheeto. Cheeto's were his favorite.

When I say Zipper is the reason I fell in love with Clint, I mean that the bond between Zipper and Clint made my heart melt. It would only seem right that I fell in love with someone that loved animals like I did and I saw that with them two. That's saying alot coming from a cowboy that grew up knowing that dogs had a job and were dispensable.

They were inseparable. They were buddies. They were loyal to one another. He went to work with Clint every single day. Everybody loved him too. Zipper loved riding on the console in Clint's truck and he perfected his lean around sharp curves to stay upright. It would have probably taken a tornado to knock Zipper off that console.

He knew his role in life and he followed rules to the point that it made him nervous. Let me elaborate on that a bit too. Here are two of Zipper's simple rules:

1. No getting in the arena when there are horses in there.

2. No chasing the barn cats.

Simple enough. Zipper concentrates really hard and takes his rules very seriously. When a cat walks by, Zipper freezes and shakes as if he stunned so he makes sure not to break his rules.

In April, someone in our neighborhood took it upon themselves to "clean up the neighborhood." Zipper was outside playing with the neighborhood kids when this person called Zipper into his vehicle. I even went to that person's door with a flier the next morning after not sleeping a wink hoping that I would hear Zipper finally scratch at the door to come inside, and that person told me that he hasn't seen him. He then took Zipper to Fort Worth the next day and dropped him off on a busy road. I found out all this information through hours of feverish investigation. If I would have known that Zipper was in that house, I would have knocked the door down.

We went to the neighborhood where we were told Zipper was dropped off and called for hours, posted fliers on every light pole we could find, pleaded with dozens of people to call with any info, placed ads in all the papers and called every dog shelter and animal control in the area to no avail. I feel sorry for that low life of a person that took a part of our family. He must have it really bad to be so hateful and awful.

We have still not found Zipper. My heart breaks everyday for him. In a moment of weakness, I break down in tears to mourn him. I still put ads in the paper every now and then. I can only hope that he has found his way into a loving home. So this post is to keep Zipper in our memory and hope that one day he finds his way back to us because we miss him deeply.

We love you Zipper and always will!

-Kaci

If you didn't notice...

I do realize that I am straying a little from my schedule. When I originally started my blog, I made an empty promise that I would blog about 1 different thing a week and post it on Sunday.

Well... if you know me then you probably know that I don't do well with schedules and plans. So this is just to let you know that I am going to blog whenever I feel like it and lately that has been several times a week. I promise to be no less than once a week unless I'm in the hospital.... or on vacation (hope that its more than a week)... or flying to the moon. But if I'm not doing those 3 things, I will be blogging. And I guess if I AM doing any of those 3 things, then I will have more to blog about! You get the idea!

Mucho amore!
-Kaci

Oh Yeah! Just to make sure you are paying attention, I will start doing small giveaways here and there!

Overwhelmed and Owning It

As women, I know we all feel overwhelmed at times. Whether your situation being married, having children, in a relationship, single, in college, having a job, staying at home with your children, or maybe a little of all of the above. We are expected to carry quite the load on our backs. And we are expected to carry this load well and follow through with tasks without a hitch and a smile on our face.

We wear many hats. I like to think of myself as the "tour manager" of the Johnson Family. It's way more rock and roll and it pretty much sums up all my jobs. I'm responsible for everything that goes on in this never ending concert of our lives and make sure it runs smoothly such as: accounting, transportation, janitorial services, accounts payable, accounts receivable, craft services (I'm working on getting better at this one), maintenance, just to name a few. I love how I sound so important! I think I need letters behind my name. Truth of the matter is, it's exhausting. But you know what? It's ok. We can do this!

Growing up as an only child, I didn't have brothers or sisters to prepare myself for having children around 24/7. I got "me" time pretty much whenever I wanted it, I did what I wanted to and I wasn't responsible for anyone or anything else. The only thing that was dependant on me were my dogs and cats and that was just for food, water and attention. No big deal. Easy peasy. Piece of cake. No problemo.

More than anything when I found out I was pregnant with our little angel, Blaze, I was freaked out because I didn't know how good a job at "Mom" I could do. I have never had such a HUGE responsibility on my shoulders before. Raising a human is probably the biggest responsibility you can have. You aren't just responsible for your job, or your relationship or marriage, you are in charge of a person's LIFE. It's YOU that shows them how to navigate through this world with as much knowledge and common sense that you can show them so they grow up to reach their potential and be respectable human beings.  Not to mention you have to feed, clothe, and clean the thing.

I never understood this before becoming a mother but parents ALWAYS want better for their children. Even if you are a millionaire, you want your children to be billionaires! When I saw little Blaze on the sonogram screen, I immediately knew my responsibility was going to be a big task. When Blaze was born, nothing could have prepared me for everything that was in store. No more sleeping in. No more going wherever I wanted whenever I wanted. Waking up at all hours of the night with a screaming baby that you have no idea why they are crying, can make YOU want to cry and hope that God gives you mercy to make it better. And the list of the way your body changes, well that's a mile long. Honestly, I was overwhelmed. BIG TIME. Thankfully Clint is such a good husband and daddy. He helped so much. Still, I did feel like I wasn't doing the best that I could because now there was SO much to do and I couldn't keep up.

Point is, no matter your situation, we are overwhelmed. We carry the weight of the world for our family. We have to be the director and get assistant director credits. The moment when we realize that this is our role and accept it, it really takes a mental load off. When you put your leader hat on and just tell yourself, "Ok, I can do this!" It makes your life so much easier. Don't sweat the small stuff because worrying about every little detail can and WILL make you go crazy. Enjoy life. Bask in every single moment that you have with your family because it goes by WAY too fast.

Love yourself. Love your family. Love life!

And remember I love you too!

-Kaci

I Want To Follow YOU

I want to follow YOU! Not in a creepy, stalker way, duh! But if you have a blog, send me a link or the web address so I can add you to my blog list on my blog. I love reading other's blogs and I'm sure the people reading mine will love to read yours too!

Feel free to comment on this post or email me @ kacijohnson@live.com so I can follow you!

Peace & Chicken Grease!

-Kaci

"Is Anybody Out There?"

I've been writing these blogs for a month or two and honestly I thought I was just writing to nobody out in cyberspace. I had a couple of comments recently on my Facebook about my blog and some of my friends had made comments that they had read my posts.

I just wanted to tell you out there that are reading this.... Thank You! I hope you enjoy my blog because I sure as heck like writing it. I think I found a passion of mine. It's weird because I've been praying for God to show me my passion in life because I could feel that I was missing something personally and I needed to find that one thing I loved and that I'm good at. Well, I'm not sure if I'm good at this blog but I love it.

Thanks for stopping by!

Much love!
-Kaci

Under Construction

Please excuse the mess I've made of my blog. I'm trying to make it look cool and add different features but I've found that I don't exactly know what I am doing so I'll be trying the good ol' trial and error method.

Also, I'm thinking about renaming my blog to something more unique and that describes me better. Any suggestions?

Peace & Blessings!
-Kaci
"Not Exactly Sure Who I Want To Be"

Friends

I had a hard time giving this blog a title because I didn't know how to explain it in just a few short words. After things going through my head like, "Where Would We Be Without Friends", "Friends Make the World Go 'Round".... and that's all I had so I decided, as you can see, I just left it simple. When in doubt, go with simple.

To make a very long story short, Clint and I were involved in a car accident November 2010. Thank God that it was our first night out without our newborn because we just dropped him off at my sister-in-laws. We were sitting still in traffic and got rear-ended and it pushed us into the vehicle in front of us. I hope that you have never been in an accident that has involved injuries  because let me tell you, it is absolutely a nightmare, especially if you don't have health insurance and Clint did not. The responsible party's insurance tells you that you are responsible for paying for all your medical bills and you will reimbursed when a settlement is made. Seriously?!?!

Well, Clint had to have shoulder surgery due to a torn rotator cuff in result of the accident. The doctor and the anesthesia's bill were the two that we were responsible for paying out of our pocket because they wouldn't accept third-party billing. So I'm freaking out, like wives do when they see a huge bill coming and wondering how to pay for it, and Clint being off work for a couple months. But let me tell you how we made it. Friends. Plain and simple. Our friends and some of our family put on a benefit roping for Clint on September 17, 2011 and it raised enough money to cover both the doctor and the anesthesia bill.

Remember in my other post I was talking about how life has a funny way of giving you exactly what you need in due time, yep this will be another one of those times.  I am continually amazed at our friends and family that pulled together and helped us out. We will never be able to express the gratitude enough of how much we appreciate all their hard work and love they have showed us. We can only hope that we can repay the favor one day. And we will try our damndest to do so.

On that note, I'm going to leave you all with this. You will never understand the implications of your acts of kindness. It just might mean the world to someone. I encourage you to "pay it forward" and go out of your way to do something kind for someone. I'm planning my next move in how to do so as I type. I understand that we all have busy lives and it seems that we don't have time in our busy schedules to set aside for someone else. But start small. Donate your old clothes to a charity, babysit for a friend that needs a break, take someone dinner that is sick. The possibilities are endless.

Peace and Blessings!
-Kaci
"The Little Pioneer Girl"